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EATING DISORDERS: WHAT'S A PARENT TO DO? By: Marsha Flood, MS, LMHC
Now, as female celebrities are frequently making tabloid news due to their ever-shrinking bodies, eating disorders have once again found their way back into our awareness. Although eating disorders usually begin between the ages of 12 and 25, we are beginning to hear from mothers of 9-year-old girls who are presenting with symptoms of anorexia or bulimia.
Today, one out of every five college women struggles with bulimia and one out of every ten is struggling with anorexia. The prevalence of this disorder among high school students is about the same. Many years ago, anorexia and bulimia occurred exclusively among middle and upper-class adolescent girls with above average intelligence. This is no longer true. Eating disorders now cut across all socio-economic, racial, age and intellectual boundaries.
THE SIGNS: WHAT TO LOOK FOR
It is important to remember that eating disorders are really not about food. They are about underlying emotional issues. For girls growing up in today's society, weight and self-esteem are closely linked. Depression and low self-esteem seem to be the keys to the development of an eating disorder; a feeling that "I'm not good enough.... if only I were skinny..." If you know what to look for, you can seek help for your daughter before symptoms become out of control. Listed, are signs and symptoms of both anorexia and bulimia:
CONTRIBUTING FACTORS As mentioned above, young women who are eating-disordered struggle with a certain degree of depression and low self-esteem. At an age when they are entering puberty, with all the inherent body changes associated with that time, they are being bombarded with peer pressure, media images and sometimes familial pressures.
There is not a parent alive who is not familiar with the role that peer pressure plays in the behavior of our children. A few years ago, a local front-page story made national news. A twelve-year-old middle school student hung himself the day before the beginning of a new school year. He was overweight and could not bear the thought of one more year of humiliation from his classmates.
Every day, adolescent girls are exposed to pressure to measure up to the physical expectations of adolescent boys. Cruel comments that may be meant as jokes can be devastating to a young girl at this extremely vulnerable time in her life. The effects of peer pressure to be thin and beautiful can lead adolescent girls to do things that are harmful to their bodies in order to be accepted by boys as well as other girls.
Advertisers spend billions of dollars every year in an effort to make us feel as bad as we possibly can about ourselves. Otherwise, we wouldn’t buy their products. That is the psychology behind advertising. We are constantly presented with images that attempt to convince us that beauty and success rests in our ability to simply buy the right products. Every day, we are inundated by images on television, in magazines and in newspapers. These images portray one single look, which is virtually unattainable by most of us. The average American woman is 5’4” and weighs 145 pounds. The average fashion model is 5’10” and weighs 111 pounds. It has been estimated that only 3-5% of women will ever reach fashion-model proportions without becoming eating disordered.
Many young women learn how to be eating-disordered at home. Children develop their attitudes about food and their bodies the same way they learn everything else in those early years; from their parents. Those of us who specialize in the treatment of eating disorders often hear our clients say that the message they received at home was that they would be liked more if they would just eat less, lose weight and wear a smaller size.
PREVENTION We know that our daughters are exposed to influences that we did not experience when we were their ages. As parents, how can we be a positive influence? The following are suggestions that are meant to help you convey healthy attitudes about food, weight and body image to your daughter.
CONCLUSION Our daughters need to feel valued, accepted and loved with no strings attached. They need to feel loved for who they are, not for what they weigh. As parents, we need to listen to them and talk directly about values, feelings and problems so that they will learn how to express feelings rather than keep them inside. We need to teach them that the scales are fickle, that dieting is dangerous and that it is WHAT’S INSIDE THAT COUNTS! If you suspect that your daughter has an eating disorder, immediately seek help from a professional who specializes in the treatment of this disease. Tell her that you are taking her to see the specialist and explain why. Expect her to be resistant. Denial is part of the disease and she may not want to let go of her behavior, but stand firm. Eating disorders are more easily treated in the beginning stages.
 Marsha Flood, MS, LMHC specializes in the treatment of eating disorders. She practices in the offices of Linda Berlin, Psy.D. & Psychological Associates in Coral Springs and Boca Raton. To learn more about Marsha Flood click here or she can be reached at (954) 227-2700 or (561) 347-0997.
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